Buckletuckle is known as the “World’s Most Kid-Friendly Town,”
and is a place where jelly beans grow on trees and kids can drive.
Buckletuckle has most holidays that any other town has: Christmas,
Thanksgiving, Independence Day, Halloween, Easter, Mother’s Day, and Father’s Day. But, unlike other towns, Buckletuckle has a day especially reserved for boys and girls. It’s called National Gift Day and occurs on the first day of spring. On this special day, parents in Buckletuckle have to buy their children a cool toy, trinket, game, gadget, gizmo, whatchamacallit, thingamajig, doohickey, or doodad. Parents who refuse to celebrate the holiday are forced to do their children’s chores for one week and can be sued in the Buckletuckle Superior Court.
The town also has an additional day in August and an extra month called Bucktember, which occurs between the months of August and September. During this unusual month, boys and girls govern all of Buckletuckle. They set the rules, write the laws, and make all the important decisions in the town.
Date of formation
Near by Cities
July 5, 1456
75% English, 15% Buckish, 10% Cabbage Tongue
Wormville, Cabbage Town, Old Yorktown, Blue Fork, Crabbington
Controlled by the Weatherizer
Jelly Bean Park, Pizzaroma
Kid-Can-Drive (January 19), Independence Day (July 7), Lazy Day (August 32), National Gift Day (1st day of Spring), Children’s Day (September 15), Jive Turkey Day (November 27)
Hotshot Academy of Great Achievement, Buckletuckle University
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Oskee, as most people know him, is Quigley’s best friend. He is faithful, considerate, trustworthy, and most of all, fun to be with. Unfortunately, he’s often teased because he’s shorter and chubbier than other children in the neighborhood. He was also the last boy in the neighborhood to learn how to whistle and still hasn’t mastered how to snap his fingers with either hand.
Once, Oskee accidentally stepped in a pile of awful-smelling dog mess. And because he had a stuffy nose that day, he strutted unknowingly around school with the foul stench emanating from his brand-new shoes. It wasn’t one of Oskee’s proudest moments.
Oskee has a special talent. He is the only kid in Buckletuckle that can “talk” to dogs. He goes beyond “whispering” and actually speaks two popular dog languages, Houndish or Pointerese. This special skill has helped Quigley and Oskee get out of a lot of troubling situations. Particularly, with Mr. Oxenburger’s dog unruly dog, Big Red, the most feared dog in Buckletuckle.
Quigley and Oskee have a lot in common and have a special bond. They both like wrestling, riding quackcycles, playing video games, and reading video game magazines. Both boys still have two of their baby teeth.
Together, Quigley and Oskee are a mischievous duo and have a special talent for getting into trouble without getting caught.
Quigley McCormick is Buckletuckle’s most famous resident. He is respectful, kind, thoughtful and has learned most lessons in life from his spunky grandfather, the person he admires the most. Quigley has an adventurous spirit which sometimes gets him in to trouble but also puts him in some amazing positions in life. Good things seem to always happen to Quigley. He is a risk-taker and is not afraid to fail. He has won his school’s spelling bee 4 times in a row and the Buckletuckle Karate Championship 3 years and counting. Simply said, he is the most interesting boy in Buckletuckle!
He is one of the most athletic boys in the town and often defends the weaker kids from the neighborhood bullies. He can have a temper at times but usually thinks about the consequences of his actions before he lets his emotions get the best of him.
Most kids in Buckletuckle admire the “Great Quigley McCormick” —most except his arch nemesis Flip Stuperton. Quigley lives with his grandparents and his six-year old pesky little sister, Moxy McCormick. The two siblings have a competitive relationship and are always playing jokes on each other. Quigley’s best friend is Oskee Nelson. When the two get together a wild adventure is never too far away.
Quigley and Moxy never met their parents. Their grandparents haven’t mustered the courage to tell them the real story of how they came to live with them. To date, Quigley and Moxy have not asked about their parents, but his grandparents know that day may come soon.
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Moxy McCormick is Quigley’s six-year old, crafty younger sister. She delights in playing the role of a pestering little sister. Depending on Moxy’s offense, Quigley often refers to her as “Big Mouth,” “Tattletale,” “Blabbermouth,” “Whistle blower,” “Chatterbox,” or “Jaw Japer.” She once put an ad in the Buckletuckle Times because she was upset with Quigley. It all started when Quigley tied her to an old maple tree in their backyard and turned on the sprinkler system. Sprayed with water for fifteen minutes, Moxy was finally rescued by her grandmother, who heard her jarring screams.
Flip Stuperton is the most notorious boy in Buckletuckle. He is mostly known for not wearing shoes. In fact, he hates anything on his feet; shoes, socks, and even soap and water. He is wise beyond his years and is an expert at finding mischief, often seen out late into the night. Most boys in the neighborhood are forbidden to play with Flip because he is rude, inconsiderate, and foul-mouthed. Some of his favorite words are “Frobble Snapper” and “Snaggle Bocker” which are all curse words in Buckletuckle.
He never brushes his teeth and needless to say, is known for having stinky breath. Perhaps even worse, he has a habit of talking to people close-up which only draws more attention to the awful smell of his breath.
Mr. Epstein Snotenbaucher is Hotshot Academy’s most infamous substitute teacher. He is a no-nonsense disciplinarian. In his free time, he collects old mufflers and has the largest collection of mufflers in Buckletuckle. Mr. Snotenbaucher generally has a bad attitude and hasn’t gotten over the fact that he was not selected for his favorite reality television show, Substitute Teachers of Buckletuckle.
Tabitha the Tree is a talking Jelly Bean tree. She is among only a few of Buckletuckle’s talking jelly bean trees. At 493 years, she is the oldest tree in the town. Her jelly beans grow year-round and sprout everything from cherry-apple to banana-chocolate jelly beans. She sleeps on most days, sometimes for months at a time.
Likes - Listening to Buckletuckle Dog-birds sing in Jelly Bean forest.
Dislikes - Stray dogs that do the “Number 1” at the base of her trunk.
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Tabitha the Tree
The Cabbage Heads
The Cabbage Heads are the brains behind the Mayor Quackenworth’s Laboratory. The Cabbage Heads are unique in that they don’t have last names and their first names have to repeat and/or rhyme with “head.” Some of the most popular Cabbage Heads include Ed Ed the Cabbage Head, Cornbread Cabbage Head, Ned Ned Cabbage Head, Zed Zed the Cabbage Head, and Drop Dead Cabbage Head, to name a few. In 1775, Quincy Quackenworth rescued the Cabbage Heads from political persecution in their native land of Cabbage Town. Ever since,they have been fiercely loyal to the Quackenworth family. Besides their names, the Cabbage Heads are best known for their stellar scientific aptitude. They have been a part of the world’s most important inventions and discoveries. In 1970, Zed Zed the Cabbage Head, President of the Buckletuckle Space Exploration Agency, discovered that the moon was made of Extra Sharp Cheddar Cheese.
Popular Buckletuckle Sports
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The Buckletuckle Wrestling Association (BWA) is one of Buckletuckle’s most popular forms of entertainment. The current champion is Steel Foot who has a record of 127-0. The most popular matches are televised on WBUCK’s Saturday morning wrestling show at 9:00 am. Most people don’t know this but, in 2005, the BWA had some financial difficulties and received bail out from Mayor Quackenworth. Mayor Quackenworth is the BWA’s biggest fan and was once the 1962 world wrestling champion.
The Hairy Hacksaw
Qickball is Buckletuckle’s second favorite sport. It’s a cross between baseball and kickball. The rules the same as in baseball except:
A yellow-striped rubber ball is kicked instead of hit with a bat.
There are 7 bases instead of 4.
There are 15 innings with 5 outs per inning.
1 point is awarded each time a player touches bases 1 through 3.
3 points are awarded for touching bases 4 through 6.
Touching all of the bases is worth 25 points.
Bases one through six are covered, along with the shortstop, rightstop, chaser, and two longstop positions.
Conrad Stinson is Buckletuckle’s greatest qickball player. Over 24 seasons, he has amassed 10 league Most Valuable Player awards, 12 league championships, 24 All Star game appearances, and 14 La Casa (home run) championships.
Cootie House - Although the story has changed over the years, most people agree that Dixon Cooty III is the main culprit behind the Cooties. Mr. Cooty refused to take a bath for 53 years. One day Mr. Cooty met a door-to-door encyclopedia salesman named Nathan Tidwell. After hearing a lengthy sales pitch, Mr. Cooty was not convinced he needed a brand new set of encyclopedias. Upon departing Mr. Cooty’s residence, the two shook hands. Mr. Tidwell left discouraged because he did not sell any encyclopedias. Determined not to quit, he tried his encyclopedia sales pitch on every household in Buckletuckle. Unbeknownst to him, Mr. Tidwell, shaking hands after every sales pitch, was spreading Mr. Cooty’s nasty germs. Days later, Buckletuckle residents reported that bumps were appearing on their necks and faces and that their teeth and finger nails were turning green. This was the start of the Cooties Epidemic of 1876. At the time, Mayor Fillmore Quackenworth, quarantined the whole town and prohibited anyone from shaking hands for three weeks. Upset, the town’s folk formed a mob, went to Mr. Cooty’s house, and forced him to take a bath. Every since then, the house located at 2020 Strawberry Lane has been known as the “Cooty House.”
To visit Buckletuckle, travel north many miles down tumbleweed-infested Highway 15 into the California desert. Four miles before the Zzyzx Road exit, about a mile from the main highway, past legions of Joshua trees and scores of Wait-a-Minute bushes, past prickly desert cacti, beautiful sunflowers and marigolds, just over the rugged eastern hillside, there is a mini rainbow that leads to a magical cave. Travelers in this mystical, rocky cavern are ferried through a worm hole to the marvelous town of Buckletuckle. The only time this can happen is when the weather is a perfect 73º Fahrenheit.
Mayor Quackenworth has agreed to adjust his immigration policy and allow a limited number of adults to come to Buckletuckle. To date, David Hollaway he is the only person in the world who has been to the world’s most kid-friendly town.
WARNING: Traveling to Buckletuckle requires a temporary visa. Anyone caught sneaking into the town, especially adults, will have to deal the Cabbage Head Security Force!
DAVID HOLLAWAY is author and illustrator of several children's books. The Los Angeles native is a graduate of the University of California at Irvine. He holds a Master’s degree in computer-based education from California State Dominguez Hills and an M.B.A. in finance from Loyola Marymount University. In his free time David likes playing video games and watching college football. David currently resides in Los Angeles.
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